FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Girl I love you like I've been drinking all day
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Randomize