I can't disclose who, but one time I called someone, they didn't pick up, and immediately texted back 'will call later, masturbating'
I thought that was really considerate
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I mean come on, he's the best quarterback in the state and doesn't even know how to put on condom
it looked like a condom graveyard when i woke up. they were everywhere
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
You just kept yelling at the cabby "I own this cab" and insisted on smoking with all the windows up
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
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