Christians are straight up FREAKS
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
We were watchin sharknado and we hooked up while I had the Donald Trump shirt on. She said she felt like he was staring at her
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
