i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
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Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
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