He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
My chiropractor just high fived me for getting drunk enough to throw my back out this weekend.. Life. Complete.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I now have a full length bright red cape in my possession. Best sex trophy ever.
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
Randomize
