i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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