its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
proudest moment: just made a guy walk into a parked car with his mouth hanging open cause of the shirt im wearing.
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Been in bed for 16 hours. Haven't eaten in 18 hours. Haven't pissed in almost 20 hours. Fuck you Stacey and your former reign as laziest bitch. I got the title now.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
Randomize
