I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Is there a non-awkward way to tell a girl I work with that she looks just like my favourite pornstar?
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Had a turkey baster with clean pee in it in my pants to pass a drug test, and the bottom fell off, so yeah I'm pretty pissed.
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
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