So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
Randomize
