If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
It's okay. My lingerie drawer is skanky enough for the two of us. Even across borders.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
We took her out for fresh air and next thing we knew, she was stumbling around the backyard picking dead leaves up off the ground and putting them in her shirt to "save them".
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
There's a lady rapping at me about making healthy food choices. She lives in a refrigerator. This is not okay with me
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Turns out naked yoga wasn't a pickup line. I feel betrayed.
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
