how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
DO IT!!! IT MUST BE FATE THAT I GAVE YOU THAT CONDOM!!!!
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
I keep replaying commercials about kittens frolicking and was crying nonstop. WILL MY PERIOD LAST FOREVER!?
The worst part was I wasn't conscious enough to move out of the way, I knew i was being puked on but I couldn't move.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
It is such a beautiful day to not be arrested
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