the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
God... We're terrible. I'm so proud of us.
I know! It makes me feel all warm inside. Or maybe that's just me getting closer to hell.
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