ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
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I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
They just called to see if he wanted to come in at 2am for overtime. He's trashed. He literally carried on a 10 minute convo with his boss about woodchucks. As in the animal
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
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Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I feel I must have sex with him first to fully decide where my vagina belongs.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
So we hooked up and then instead of texting me, he endorsed me on LinkedIn for Microsoft Word a few days later