Porn is love you can see.
Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
John tries to set me up, and she has 1 arm. I'm a nice guy, but 2 arms is kinda a requirement
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
So I was thinking for Halloween I'd do Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde....for my vagina.
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
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