you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
I will make out with the first guy who tries to pick me up with a lyric from a rap song. I won't even reply, just be on him like whoa.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
You put your red cup in a chain link fence and kept telling me you could use it as a telescope
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I need to talk about my life with someone. Preferably with someone who hasn't tried to jizz on me
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
You are cordially invited to an I'm not pregnant laser tag celebration tomorrow. booze is optional.
I've just had two stress filled days in a row , I'm just going to shower and await your penis
Who the fuck stole my fridge again
Randomize
