By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
The fire alarm went off at 3 am in the freshmen dorm. So guess which junior everyone now knows is hooking up with a freshman? This girl...
Imma do me. And by that, I mean I'm going to walk across campus still drunk at 9am on a Tuesday.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
I'm eating shredded cheese and chugging coke, until I can function again. I'm tingling everywhere
And then the night went full on bisexual.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Randomize