To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to sleep with your sister' discount
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
He fell off a seesaw, tore half his ear off and somehow convinced the paramedic he was allowed to have a beer while being treated
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
answer my text you professional douchebag
and i mean that in the cutest, flirtiest way possible
Do you think I need to report to HR that the intern and I had butt sex?
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.