Your lack of dick hurts my anus. I hate your loverboy tactics.
idk why but i just wanna to have sex with the idea of him. i don't even wanna meet him.
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
I dont have any paper so I'm writing class notes on my first response direction pregnancy paper. Judging eyes are all around.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
