alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
