That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
Just ate applesauce I laced with percocets for dinner. I'm pretty sure my grandmother does the same thing.
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
i just looked in the mirror i look like i'm about to film a PSA about prostitution
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
They were loudly fucking last night and there was way too much conversation involved. It wasn't even dirty talk, it was more like "your doing it wrong" talk
You should come by for the fire station blow job tour
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
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