Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
Getting up is taking longer than anticipated. Alcoholic fish bowls have made getting out of bed a multitstep process.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
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Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
Seriously, come get him. He's not even a person anymore. He's a loud, drunk, cock-blocking wrecking ball.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Been awake for 50 some odd hours. I've discovered I can spew out maaaad papers whilst coked out of my face. My roommates probably think I'm dead. Money well spent. You?
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
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