I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
My roommate made me go home after I mooed at fat girls at the gas station.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
My last google search is "how to build a flamethrower"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Why are your pants in the freezer?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
You know it's a good May 2-4 when it involves 14 straight hours of vodka slush and garlic bread
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