her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I found dried jizz from last night on my leg while feeding an infant a bottle. I am not fit to care for children
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Randomize
