If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
You just wait. When you see me foam roll naked, you're going to lose your mind.
If by fun you mean, did I meet her cousin for the.first time and bang him, then yes it was a productive evening.
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
Randomize