If I could text you the sound of me vomming, I would.
Conclusion from last night: Sometimes being classy isn't as fun as making out with a guy on a pooltable in a bar. Happy birthday, Canada.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
I give out orgasms like candy and ride a motorcycle...how is that not appealing
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize