Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I got into an eating contest with Christina. I ate 6 oranges.
Why? Who won?
we don't know. we ran out of oranges.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
After I talked about my ex for about twenty minutes, she just listened, sluts are so understanding
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just met the 30 percent of the population with an STD
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
My sharpie cut off line was invaded last night. Where's my turtleneck?
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
My boob job is like a master key that gets me in any door, any party and anyone’s pants! They’re magical!
Randomize