But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
My vagina is officially offended.
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I fucked a marine... I told him it was like personal revenge and he said he could live with that and that he didn't mind being used.
The gyno waiting room is so strange because the pregnant woman next to me is making a PowerPoint of her pregnant photo shoot with her husband and I’m sitting here trying to figure out from Instagram who I had sex with on Sunday lol
Randomize