I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
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