Plan B is the new Plan A
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
She just squirted all over my face. then laughed at me and took a pic
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
there are two kinds of girls in this world: my mom, and sluts.
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Something in me snapped and now I’m just googling famous vegans.
Randomize
