what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
I specifically found a fat girl to lift me up on her shoulders.\n\nIt was glorious.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
I've had to take two showers today and it's not even 1 o'clock. Why won't this weekend wash off?
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
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