I don't know how I got that girl last night. I feel like seal right now sans the scars
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
There is nothing scarier than watching yourself breathe in the mirror while on shrooms.
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
breakfast this morning: omelette, Valium and baileys hot chocolate
Now that sounds like the breakfast of champions
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