in the car goin home for fam dinner and he is silent... i think he realized how big of a whore his little sister is
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
Your brother just informed me that half a mouthful is a unit of measurement. I love talking to members of your family.
hammered. By myself. Accident. Faillll. Snowwwwwy
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
