I just threw up, I'm either bulemic or pregnant, and I'm now accepting bets on which it is
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
it's not like i was drunk to the point of NEEDING help...i just wanted someone to offer to hold my hair or something.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Let's just do a victory lap through all of our exes.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
They made me leave the maternity ward, how do I get back in?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
