white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I forgot drug dealers have families, too. Cheers to a sober, uncomfortable, slightly enraging Thanksgiving.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Dude!! Who the fuck glued Cheetos to my couch? Bastards!!
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Randomize
