I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
I just feel as thought we should spend the day in which we celebrate relationships the same as how we started them. Drunken hook ups.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Its a shame I cant put 'bomb ass head game' on my resume.
Randomize
