:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
I just took two shots of Burnerts out of a ladle. Get here now.
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
mom had to come pick me up from the hotel. I crawled to her car. She told me the entire way home if I puked in it I was going to lick it up. Like high school all over again...
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
MEG JUST LICKED A DRAIN PIPE. DAVE PUNCHED MATT IN THE THROAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN. I REPEAT. ALL BOUNDARIES ARE DOWN.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
