you know its a sad night when you can actually see and hear sitcoms on at the bar
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
I had to convince you not to write "happy birthday to the first guy who fingered me" on his facebook wall, right above the post from his current girlfriend's mother.
God gave him joint rollers for hands
These 23 People Had The Most Insane Spring Breaks Ever
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Im coming down to miami this weekend
We shall drink from the everclear river
25 Women On How They Let Their Oblivious Partners Know They Want To Bone
I couldn't drink enough to fuck the friend, you said challenge accepted and stole some chicks shot.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
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