Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too. http://tfl.nu/hrck
  Replies (26) Good night (4455) Bad night (778) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (978): Do you think anyone has ever tried to have sex with a cows udder before? http://tfl.nu/qhly
  Replies (28) Good night (585) Bad night (6168) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (774): View more from Massachusetts

  all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (774): all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you" http://tfl.nu/p8m9
  Replies (19) Good night (1879) Bad night (5616) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (815): View more from Illinois

  Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (815): Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again. http://tfl.nu/ev5h
  Replies (5) Good night (5144) Bad night (762) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (505): View more from New Mexico

  I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (505): I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation http://tfl.nu/u5tc
  Replies (12) Good night (1013) Bad night (3038) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (925): View more from California

  All I want is tacobeell and your body

  (1-925): View more from California

  that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (925): All I want is tacobeell and your body (1-925): that's my favorite sentence you've ever said. http://tfl.nu/3boc
  Replies (8) Good night (2733) Bad night (876) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (618): I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low. http://tfl.nu/dyuf
  Replies (5) Good night (376) Bad night (1311) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (240): View more from Maryland

  SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (240): SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP http://tfl.nu/udxy
  Replies (18) Good night (621) Bad night (2180) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?! http://tfl.nu/drpl
  Replies (21) Good night (1413) Bad night (268) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (705): View more from Ontario

  I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (705): I had to keep telling myself 'you can't be mad at him because you peed on him' http://tfl.nu/4xts
  Replies (2) Good night (443) Bad night (796) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (337): View more from Louisiana

  Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (337): Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum http://tfl.nu/ae6k
  Replies (7) Good night (752) Bad night (401) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (914): View more from New York

  Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (914): Add caroling to the list of things we need to do in an elevator http://tfl.nu/9f4r
  Replies (2) Good night (720) Bad night (217) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (319): View more from Iowa

  God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (319): God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real http://tfl.nu/8qp8
  Replies (2) Good night (1366) Bad night (248) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (678): View more from Georgia

  Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.

  (404): View more from Georgia

  We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (678): Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to. (404): We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit. http://tfl.nu/4kzw
  Replies (2) Good night (1026) Bad night (532)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something. http://tfl.nu/os86
  Replies (0) Good night (434) Bad night (188) Order T-Shirt

Randomize