Booty call?
Dude you don't even follow my twitter
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Theres either a bag of coke in my pocket or a bag of anthrax, either way last night got way to serious
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
50% drunk capacity currently
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
their motto was "the first one to get arrested wins" so of course today was interesting
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