If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
Last awkward moment of 2011: your ex gf grinding on me in front of her husband.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
