whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I woke up only wearing a Breaking Bad "Los Pollos Hermanos" apron he got from Loot Crate next to a 3 empty bottles of Zima,Jolly Ranchers, and a jar of coconut oil. Fernet is one hell of a party starter
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
I woke up naked and alone this morning. What a life
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