Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
my grandpa paid for my boob job but he just doesn't know it.
Look, if it comes down to it, I’m spraying whipped cream on your nuts
Randomize
