he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Dear Jesus. Send me strength to not suck cock this morning.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
