I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
My friend and I just coined a new term. OBJ. The obligatory blow job. You totally know what I'm talking about.
Like if he goes down on you first, or you just don't want to bone him yet. OBJ.
I found a lucrative side business - giving rides home to drunk oil executives. Very profitable.
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
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