So did the night end well for you?
I stole a traffic cone and drunk texted my sister because i couldn't think of any other girl to text
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Based off the amount of cat hair on my poncho....i stole a cat last night.
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
