Texts From Last Night

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  (330): View more from Ohio

  now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me

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  (330): now everythime i write "i'm" in my phone my tap9 spells out "i'm-never-drinking-again". It's trying to remind me http://tfl.nu/m2x7
  Replies (6) Good night (2739) Bad night (526) Order T-Shirt
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  (415): View more from California

  u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them

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  (415): u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them http://tfl.nu/vc7z
  Replies (43) Good night (3631) Bad night (583) Order T-Shirt
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  (608): View more from Wisconsin

  Im mastering the way to pass gas silently.

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  (608): Im mastering the way to pass gas silently. http://tfl.nu/n26o
  Replies (24) Good night (2830) Bad night (695) Order T-Shirt
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter.

  (407): View more from Florida

  i think you have the wrong number

  (813): View more from Florida

  so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool.

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  (813): I may or may not have eaten the rest of your birthday cake last night after getting blazed and watching harry potter. (407): i think you have the wrong number (813): so then it wasn't your birthday cake. k, cool. http://tfl.nu/uuec
  Replies (70) Good night (6891) Bad night (480)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it

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  (813): There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it http://tfl.nu/xcmh
  Replies (19) Good night (652) Bad night (3439) Order T-Shirt
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  (614): View more from Ohio

  this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had

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  (614): this may or may not be the weed talking, but this is by far the best tasting toothpaste i've ever had http://tfl.nu/9bpx
  Replies (7) Good night (5914) Bad night (511) Order T-Shirt
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  (925): View more from California

  no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes.

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  (925): no, i'm proud of you. this is the happiest you've been since you discovered that bowls can be used as cups if you don't feel like washing dishes. http://tfl.nu/3pwk
  Replies (13) Good night (5525) Bad night (509) Order T-Shirt
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.

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  (401): Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you. http://tfl.nu/r8h0
  Replies (12) Good night (1070) Bad night (3416) Order T-Shirt
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  (240): View more from Maryland

  He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?

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  (240): He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half? http://tfl.nu/4690
  Replies (48) Good night (4041) Bad night (1265) Order T-Shirt
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  (916): View more from California

  You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.

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  (916): You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest. http://tfl.nu/46jw
  Replies (6) Good night (3852) Bad night (1023) Order T-Shirt
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  my self respect just called, its having a good time without me

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  (856): my self respect just called, its having a good time without me http://tfl.nu/iprn
  Replies (9) Good night (2976) Bad night (953) Order T-Shirt
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  (951): View more from California

  Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.

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  (951): Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team. http://tfl.nu/ve6p
  Replies (9) Good night (2002) Bad night (579)
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  (530): View more from California

  it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam

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  (530): it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam http://tfl.nu/24cr
  Replies (4) Good night (3168) Bad night (810) Order T-Shirt
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  (407): View more from Florida

  Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.

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  (407): Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does. http://tfl.nu/r28t
  Replies (3) Good night (1578) Bad night (322) Order T-Shirt
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  (906): View more from Michigan

  does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?

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  (906): does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex? http://tfl.nu/8dql
  Replies (2) Good night (411) Bad night (278) Order T-Shirt

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