nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You SHOULD feel empty, we were at the top of our game, and by that i mean snorting things we don't understand and only a few steps away from adultery.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated