I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
You pulled me aside and handed me a plastic childrens' tea cup full of 151 and said "trust me its a great idea"
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
