Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
Listen, this was just a tiny lapse of judgement.
I'm pretty sure that's not a synonym for pregnancy.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
we both turned hook ups into relationships we are crushing this thing called life right now.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
He painted a swimsuit on me. Naked day at the lake was a success.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Next time I will hook the Xbox before I get high I spent 30minuts thinking I was playing the Simpsons game when it was in reality a tv episode
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Randomize
