I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
I just realized my hands still smell like your cock. Which is awesome, but I wonder if the clerk at the store appreciated it.
I feel bad. I'm the reason hand sanitizer exists.
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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