Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Today a TA in one of my classes told me he thought I was 35 and going back to school as an adult learner. Alcohol is working me.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
Randomize