He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Shower sex is an art that should not be attemted drunk
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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